Thursday, July 4, 2013

Refrain :')


"If you find it in your heart to care for somebody else, you will have succeeded."-Maya Angelou

Refrain.It is equal to the word Enduring/Endurance.Maybe.
Sometimes you have to refrain yourself.Because you feel it is for the best.Refrain.
Refrain because you are trying to look at the bright sight but sometimes BAM!The future
seems pretty gloomy.DARK.And when you don't wanna move.And
when you finally said you're done.Done,period!BAM, miracle happen.But
you are wondering,this time how long could it lasts?Refrain.
Refrain because you feel like your words,your effort has becomes nothing but worthless.
Sometimes you have prepare this whole surprises,events,words,yet you swallow all of 
it because you afraid of the awful reaction or the possible worse out come. It could be like the worse
you could get.Yes thanks for the bad imagination.
But sometimes,because you don't wanna change that thing.You don't wanna ruin that
precious bond with each other.The bond that you alone treasure it.You don't wanna be see as
retarded  or weird.But what you don't see is the more you hide it,the more weirder
you have become.
It its not because you are coward.It was never because you are a liar.
but because you care.but because you love.that is why,refrain.
Sometimes the word or the thing that you really wanna do is sorta stuck on the back of
your throat,or you wrote it with care but you keep on deleting it as if
as it is not important.
and sometimes even at the gate of letting go,you hold everything you wanna say and smile.
Walla,refraining.Yeah it is refrain.I bet a lot of you are refraining yourself.
Have you ever wanna utter this words
"Hey I don;t like you at all,because I ---- you!"
Ngahahhah,That 4 alphabet is a struggling,isn't it?

The conversation.Here we go again.
"No no no!You are not running away this time!"He.
"Hahahah.yes I will!And you can't stop me!"She.
"What is the problem?Afraid to even utter?"He.
"Everything is the problem.Me.Im weird,and everything about me is not according
to that person dreams I guess.Over sensitive,over romantic and over everything!"She.
"Well at least you are trying hard to refraining yourself.Ngahahha!"He.
"That is so not funny!"She.
"Well you burst about everything but you never utter the most IMPORTANT words!
Those three words are reallly important,do you know that?"He.
"Im afraid.This time would be the last time if I ever utter it.This is the first time
after so many years,I don't wannna lose a person. "She.
"Then let me try?"He.
"No!Are you crazy man?Let it be."She.
"Well if I give you to handle  this,it might take forever,don't you think so?"He.
"Let it be!I will try to refrain harder!"She.
"Why I can't know the exact story?"He.
"No one know the EXACT story.Because I learn that people never listen truthfully maybe.
I told 60% of the story and they don't even bother to understand of it properly.So why should I bother?"She.
"Hey,Im not like that!"He.
"Lol,you are so like that!But let it be.Let it be."She.
"Wow Im amazed with your patient nowadays."He.
"Not so.Im still a crying baby."She.
"It's okay,I lend you my earss and shoulder through skyping okay?"He.
"Lol.Not funny.You know,I wish to begin again."She.
"You are starting over,and Im a proud bestfriend!"He.
"Will you be disappoint on me?"She.
"Why should I?Human are imperfect.Even if you fail,I will be there to cheer you up."He.
"We are totally weird."She.
"I agree with that,but isn't it beautiful?"He.
"What is beautiful?"She.
"That we don't have those mushy mushy feelings but really care of each other so much."He.
"Yes.Feels like crying!Thank you pumpkin!"She.
"Im not that fat okay?"He.
"You are my teddy bear."She.
"Hahahha,cheer up okay?The sky won't forever be dark.Recites the Quran,
if you feel empty.And you can take wuduk to ease yourself.Be closer to our
Creator.And ifr Im not there when you need the most,wait.While waiting,you should
recites Yassin okay?I'll be there.And if Im not there,remember I care for you.So never
do anything stupid.Because I love you."He.
"As friendlah mangkuk."He.
"Hahhaha,saja je lah.Thank you.Sobs!"She.
"You know.I know exactly how hard is refraining. You feel insecure,you hurt alone, you might feel that
way,but remember Allah loves you so much,Even when Im not there,even when you are alone,
you know Allah is with you and you will never walk alone,right?"He.
"I know.I know.I keep remind myself of it too.It's amazing
how I can actually sense that something is not right but Im too coward to ask.
So I refrain myself.What more can I do besides just hoping and praying for the best bro?"She.

You read.You listen.You don't know the whole story.Stop judging.
Tadaa.Salam Ramadhan.
So sorry for the lateness.
I've been busy!

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